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China Buys Google

Posted by Zonk on Sat Apr 01, 2006 01:42 PM
from the are-you-feeling-loyal,-citizen? dept.

Fry-kun writes "The Register reports that a controlling amount of Google's Class B stock was purchased today a corporate entity owned by the Chinese Ministry of Information." From the article: "Amongst the assets acquired by the Chinese government is NASA's Ames Research Center. Google announced a partnership with Ames last year, and, as it turns out, the move laid the groundwork for the takeover by the PRC. The Chinese will gain control of the world's largest wind tunnels - devices that when opened up could be used to push the smell of Mu Shu Pork across much of Silicon Valley, or conversely be used to spread avian bird flu, or mind-altering substances."

[+] aprilfools, google, china, assholes, test (tagging beta)

Brian Puccio writes "Possibly as a result of their recent purchase by Chinese national interests, Robert Scoble, (in)famous Microsoft blogger and evangelist, has decided to go work for Google: 'I just got off the phone with Larry Page. He's offered me a job to run Google's PR department and I've decided to take him up on it. Why? Because I finally realized that Steve Gillmor is right. Microsoft Office is dead and I wanted to be at the company that is the future of everything... My first project will be to convert the Scoble Dashboard over to a Linux box.'"

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Sure! (Score:2)

by Kickboy12 (913888)

I love the smell of Mu Shu Pork in the morning.
- Re:Sure! (Score:2)
  
  by TheOldFart (578597)
  
  You're more likely to get pooh pooh platter today though...
- Re:Sure! (Score:2)
  
  by Eric Giguere (42863)
  
  On a related note, Google is allowing AdSense publishers to click ads [memwg.com] since click fraud isn't such a big deal [theglobeandmail.com].
  
  Eric
  How to find the BlackBerry OS version [cluelessabout.com]
- Re:Sure! (Score:1)
  
  by mumblingrepublican (965314) *
  
  Smells like victory!
lfmao (Score:4, Funny)

by alx5000 (896642) <alx5000@alx50[ ]net ['00.' in gap]> on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:47PM (#15042539) Homepage

Free Google? I'll take it... [On the phone] China? I have something you might want, but it's going to cost you. That's right, all the tea.
- Re:lfmao (Score:1)
  
  by sirber (891722)
  
  lol! I just watched that episode yesterday :D
RTFA (Score:5, Funny)

by thefirelane (586885) on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:47PM (#15042541) Homepage

Even the article gets it wrong, it really is: "Google Buys China"
- prOn (Score:1)
  
  by climbon321 (874929)
  
  Will I still be able to google for pr0n?
- Re:RTFA (Score:2)
  
  by Jonny Ringo (444580)
  
  I new it was wrong when it says China has a ministry. HAHAHA, fools China banned religion a while ago!!
Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Troll)

by plankrwf (929870)

I'm glad that within a few hours, life will return to normal.
Roel
- Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2, Flamebait)
  
  by arakon (97351)
  
  Yeah I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who gets tired of this stupid shit. It's not even funny, just juvenile for the most part. Check other news sites and see how many of them are running "April Fools" jokes (outside of their normal sensationalistic
  - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Troll)
    
    by outZider (165286)
    
    It would do you well to "get over it". Slashdot isn't CNN. At the end, it's still run by a bunch of geeky kids who grew up. Kinda.
  - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)
    
    by binarybum (468664)
    
    Yeah I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who gets tired of this stupid shit.
    Man, quit being such a dullard. [file-place.com]
    
    This is officially the one day of the year I'd rather read CNN/FOX news than slashdot
    
    Then this "officially" t
    - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1)
      
      by Andrzej Sawicki (921100)
      
      It's the voices, obviously. Why do you have to ask?
    - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)
      
      by arakon (97351)
      
      I work weekends in a boring ass job by myself where I wait for the BIG RED button to start blinking. I have an 8x10 room full of control panels, a bathroom and an internet connection with VERY limited access to what i can read (filtered gov job). SO it g
  - - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)
      
      by arakon (97351)
      
      because I've already read about as much as I can take of CNN?
- Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Redundant)
  
  by EnsilZah (575600)
  
  GMT time?
  Ah, you must be from the redundant department of redundancy.
  - Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)
    
    by jacksonj04 (800021)
    
    It's self-fulfilling moderation!
- Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1)
  
  by plankrwf (929870)
  
  Wow, actually scoring a 'Troll' for a posting... (see parent). Well, wondered whether 'Good Karma' would last...
  Roel
I for one (Score:5, Funny)

by themusicgod1 (241799) <themusicgod1NO@SPAMzworg.com> on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:54PM (#15042557) Homepage Journal

I, for one, welcome our new Chinese Google Overlords
- Re:I for one (Score:2)
  
  by Firehed (942385)
  
  I belive the soon-to-be-accepted term for that is Chinooglords (Chai-new-gul-oards).
- Re:I for one (Score:1)
  
  by sryx (34524)
  
  I, for one, welcome our new Chinese Google Overlords
  
  New?
  -Jason
  - Re:I for one (Score:1)
    
    by warrior_s (881715)
    
    I, for one, welcome our new Chinese Google Overlords
    may be you mean "Choogle" Overlords.
More then 400 more joke sites from today (Score:3, Informative)

by Urgo (28400) on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:54PM (#15042560) Homepage

For the third year in a row, Urgo's list of April Fool's Jokes on Websites [urgo.org] contains the most complete list of April Fool's Day pranks websites have created. Featured by news.com.com.com.. [com.com] and Microsoft [microsoft.com], the site strives to list EVERY joke site, and is updated every few minutes with new verified jokes.

Here is a sample, the twenty most popular ones:
blog.outer-court.com [outer-court.com] - Google Rooms
thinkgeek.com [thinkgeek.com] - USB Tanning Center, RFID Blocking T-shirt, Grow Your mymsnsearch.com [mymsnsearch.com] - fake (but hilariously accurate) search results gtachicago.com [gtachicago.com] - gta chicago does not exist, (*hint check the whois info*)
tveps.net [tveps.net] - Isaac 'Chef' Hayes not leaving southpark after all. Comes clean that it was a publicity stunt.
iwantoneofthose.com [iwantoneofthose.com] - tiny device that downloads your brain's memory to a 2GB USB Flash Drive
blizzard.com [blizzard.com] - BLIZZARD ENTERTAINMENT® PRESENTS BURGERCRAFT(TM)
bolloxcomics.co.uk [bolloxcomics.co.uk] - Myspace parody
figuiere.net [figuiere.net] - int is_computer_on(void)
wiebetech.com [wiebetech.com] - 5 TB iPod
googlesystem.blogspot.com [blogspot.com] - Google Browser is finally launched. Installer 1.68MB
steampowered.com [steampowered.com] - VALVe purchased by Apple
slashdot.org [slashdot.org] - OMG!!! PONIES!!! (and pink layout)
ogrish.com [ogrish.com] - (NSFW) Bizarre Baby Born In Nepal
worldofwarcraft.com [worldofwarcraft.com] - Blizzard to put Wisps as a playable race for World of Warcraft.
gearlog.com [gearlog.com] - Laptop Lingerie: Bringing Tech & Pleasure Together
2600.com [2600.com] - 200600 google spoof
bungie.net [bungie.net] - Bungie's next game, Pimps At Sea, progessing nicely for the Xbox360
forums.worldofwarcraft.com [worldofwarcraft.com] - World of Warcraft 1.11 patch notes leaked
theregister.co.uk [theregister.co.uk] - customise The Register to suit your needs - from blocking ads, to selecting the kind of stories you really want to read.
Read the rest of this comment...
- Oh my... (Score:1)
  
  by FourStarGeneral (851478)
  
  Anybody else getting tired of this guy? I, for one, am appalled that /. continues to allow such an obvious spammer to keep posting.
  - Re:Oh my... (Score:2)
    
    by coolGuyZak (844482)
    
    He's not spamming. He's karma whoring. (or possibly both).
No, no... (Score:5, Funny)

by SheeEttin (899897) <sheeettin@@@gmail...com> on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:55PM (#15042562) Homepage

No, no, you have it all wrong.
Google buys China. It's cheap (why do you think all the toys are?), so this is where Google begins its plans for world domination.
Google does no evil at all--in fact, by buying up the world and controlling it, it makes it much less evil. One's own purposes are never evil.
Love it! (Score:3, Funny)

by Beckiewink (965318) on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:56PM (#15042565)

I just wanted to say, I LOVE the new redesign and I totally hope you keep it. Please? I even registered just to say that I LOVE it.
- Re:Love it! (Score:2)
  
  by VJ42 (860241)
  
  Me Too!
  
  I love teh ponies!!!111
- Re:Love it! (Score:1)
  
  by romiz (757548)
  
  I LOVE the new redesign
  
  Just go to the games section, the color scheme looks ugly like that everyday.
Class B stock? (Score:3, Interesting)

by Frodo420024 (557006) <henrik&fangorn,dk> on Saturday April 01 2006, @01:57PM (#15042572) Homepage Journal

I thought the class B stock was the one without voting power?
OTOH, on a day like this, Everything you know is wrong [dmweb.free.fr].
That explains it! (Score:1)

by edwardpickman (965122)

Every time I type in "Porn" it takes me to a site on Mao. I thought it was a typo at first.
Google to Googlize the Googlenet. (Score:2, Informative)

by Domo-Sun (585730)

Google has purchased the Googleheimer Googlesphere to further Googlize the Googlenet into a Googlable Googlben. Google's googlies and googlans are gabbling to Googlize Googillion Googlepoo Googies, for the Goodness of the Googlopolis.

A spokesperson for MSN
M$ uses Firefox (Score:1, Interesting)

by Anonymous Coward

MS Coding4Fun - Randomly Opening CD Tray [microsoft.com]

Notice the screenshot?
- Re:M$ uses Firefox (Score:1)
  
  by qzulla (600807)
  
  With OS X I can do this in a shell with:
  
  drutil tray open
  drutil tray close
  
  A few random timing loops and you are good to go.
  
  Came in handy once when I was remoted in and ejected a CD. I didn't want to go to the other building and hassle someone to open the do
- - Re:M$ uses Firefox (Score:1)
    
    by oddfox (685475)
    
    That's no task bar. You see the first screenshot? Where they're talking about the Google Web Accelerator [google.com]? That's Firefox right there, the throbber is unmistakable and I personally use that Accelerator myself in XP, so the GP is correct in his assertion as
Cheap Storage for G-Drive (Score:1)

by slashmaddy (964291)

I'm glad that this move would help google get some cheap storage space for faster implementation of G-Drive. Can't wait for it anymore.
.ch? Not .cn? (Score:1)

by ConstantineM (965345)

These lads from the Register don't know that China has .cn as its top level domain. Their screenshot lists the top-level domain for Switzerland instead. :)
Re: Politics: China Buys Google (Score:1)

by Ricken (797341)

I first thought the topic said "Politics: Google Buys China"
- Re: Politics: China Buys Google (Score:1)
  
  by EstupidoPopulista (965785)
  
  Me too !! LOL
Search results? (Score:1)

by bk4u (682315)

Does this mean our search results will be filtered?
/. is so f*ing lame (Score:2)

by partingshot (156813)

1999 called - it wants it's april fool's hoaxes back.
- Google (Score:2)
  
  by roman_mir (125474)
  
  By the way, I didn't see anything on Google that would confirm that they are playing any practical jokes on people today.
  
  You know, they could be funnier. I suggest a game here, on /.
  Select a topic, and imagine what Google search could have returned as hit
  - Re:Google (Score:1)
    
    by qzulla (600807)
    
    I would say google romance [google.com] qualifies.
    Take the tour.
    qz
- Re:This will only be temporary (Score:2)
  
  by Lehk228 (705449)
  
  the register is in on the april 1 antics

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Sure! (Score:2)

Re:Sure! (Score:2)

Re:Sure! (Score:2)

Re:Sure! (Score:1)

lfmao (Score:4, Funny)

Re:lfmao (Score:1)

RTFA (Score:5, Funny)

prOn (Score:1)

Re:RTFA (Score:2)

Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Troll)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2, Flamebait)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Troll)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1, Redundant)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:2)

Re:Glad only few "GMT time" before it's April 2nd (Score:1)

I for one (Score:5, Funny)

Re:I for one (Score:2)

Re:I for one (Score:1)

Re:I for one (Score:1)

More then 400 more joke sites from today (Score:3, Informative)

Oh my... (Score:1)

Re:Oh my... (Score:2)

No, no... (Score:5, Funny)

Love it! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Love it! (Score:2)

Re:Love it! (Score:1)

Class B stock? (Score:3, Interesting)

That explains it! (Score:1)

Google to Googlize the Googlenet. (Score:2, Informative)

M$ uses Firefox (Score:1, Interesting)

Re:M$ uses Firefox (Score:1)

Re:M$ uses Firefox (Score:1)

Cheap Storage for G-Drive (Score:1)

.ch? Not .cn? (Score:1)

Re: Politics: China Buys Google (Score:1)

Re: Politics: China Buys Google (Score:1)

Search results? (Score:1)

/. is so f*ing lame (Score:2)

Google (Score:2)

Re:Google (Score:1)

Re:This will only be temporary (Score:2)

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