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Canada and Denmark using Google as Battleground 341

Posted by Zonk from the fighting-for-mindspace dept.
TedRiot writes "Canada and Denmark are fighting over Hans Island using Google as battleground. A quick search of 'hans island' revealed a paid advertisement with the banner headline: 'Hans Island is Greenland. Greenland natives have used the island for centuries.' The ad was linked to the Danish government's foreign affairs web page with the letter condemning Graham's visit. Toronto resident Rick Broadhead placed a Google ad and said the Canadian government needs to get with the times." Reuters has coverage as well.
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Canada and Denmark using Google as Battleground More

Canada and Denmark using Google as Battleground

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  • Some "battleground"... (Score:5, Insightful)

    by daveschroeder ( 516195 ) * on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:30PM (#13199225)
    Searching for "hans island" (both with and without enclosing quotes) returns nothing as described in the summary and articles.

    The first hit is an over-2-year-old Maritime Affairs (Canada) article [naval.ca]explaining why Hans Island is (or should be) Canadian Territory. (Actually an interesting read...)

    The second hit is the Wikipedia article.

    In fact, the supposed site(s) is nowhere in the first page of hits.

    Or the second page.

    The news hits refer to Google supposedly having these ads, but that reference is somewhat circular, since I can't find the paid advertisement, banner, or site in question anywhere on Google.

    The sponsored (ad) links on the right sidebar include a Web Design ad, and the marginally entertaining:

    Hans Island - Dispute
    Why Worry about Hans Island When
    What you need is an Ergonomic Chair
    www.ergo4me.com

    A search for "Hans Island is Greenland" returns nothing but...you guessed it, the news articles claiming there's a paid site on Google that says "Hans Island is Greenland." Likewise for "Hans Island is {Canadian|Canada}." Now, I'm not saying the articles are lying (and perhaps Google pulled the ads for some reason), but since this article is exclusively about how the battle for Hans Island is being taken to Google, and is entitled "Politics: Canada and Denmark using Google as Battleground", well, I'd love to see it.

    Because I see nothing except someone pimping knockoff ergonomic chairs with eBay-style "searchsquatting".

    And, amusingly, as I'm typing this article, I see more paid hits appearing. Google started with one. Then the ergonomic chair ad was added. Now, as I'm about to post, there is a "Hans Island is Canada" link...by vaginainstitute.com [vaginainstitute.com], a site apparently dedicated to, erm, researching vaginas.

  • blame canada (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:32PM (#13199235)
    i hope the danes and canada go to war over this..
    with these two military powers squaring off somebody is bound to lose an eye

  • It has to be said: (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Crowhead ( 577505 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:33PM (#13199242)
    CRIPPLE FIGHT!!!!!

  • Wow, two superpowers battle it out... (Score:5, Funny)

    by B11 ( 894359 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:34PM (#13199248)
    This is what happens when you aren't bloodthirsty war-mongers. Instead of invading each other you decide to launch marketing campaigns on the internet.

    Canada being soft I understand, but Denmark? These people used to be Vikings, shessh!

    I say the settle it with a friendly game of Risk and call it a day.

  • So there really isn't anything new under the sun? (Score:5, Insightful)

    by ucahg ( 898110 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:34PM (#13199249)
    As a Canadian, I must admit I've never heard of this debate until now. I find it intriguing, but even more so is the nature of the argument. Now perhaps its just me, but does it not remind you of two siblings fighting over a small toy?

    Except on a grander scale.
    • Well, let's face it, all the really good territory was long ago claimed, so all that's left are miscellaneous chunks of rock that are sticking out of the water here and there. My solution is to bring in about fifty thousand pounds of dynamite.

    • Re:So there really isn't anything new under the su (Score:5, Interesting)

      by twilight30 ( 84644 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:56PM (#13199382) Homepage
      As another Canadian recently returned to Canada, I can tell you why they're fighting over it -- however stupid the whole notion is.

      We are fighting with the Danish over this to enforce our sovereignty. Unfortunately, like private arena disputes over copyright, failure to exert sovereignty means you effectively cede control over an area. Lose it if you don't use it, more or less.

      We actually have a First Nations military unit [forces.gc.ca] dedicated to looking after our interests in remote northern communities.

      You can read an entertaining article about the Canadian Rangers here [thestar.com].

    • Re:So there really isn't anything new under the su (Score:4, Interesting)

      by Medgur ( 172679 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @08:03PM (#13199423) Homepage
      As another Canadian, I'm far more concerned by the USA's refusal to recognise the water between Canadian Arctic Islands as internal waters of Canada. This has resulted in a few environmental and militaristic shinnanigans.

      Here's hoping no one finds oil off the coast up there.

    • Re:So there really isn't anything new under the su (Score:5, Insightful)

      by captain_craptacular ( 580116 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @08:07PM (#13199452)
      This is actually far more important than siblings fighting over a toy.

      For one there is a natural resources issue. There are billions of barrels of oil buried along the north slope of Alaska and Canada not too far from this island.

      Second, and possibly more importantly, there is a key territory issue. The polar ice caps are melting and it is predicted that within the next 50 years they will have melted enough to allow circumpolar shipping routes to open through the arctic. The country who controls the waters this route passes through effectively controls the route and will therefore own what will likely be the worlds most important shipping lane. (Europe to west coast USA, and Europe to China/East Asia) The idea here is that this route will pass within the territorial boundary marker of Hans Island. Denmark has far more to lose in this regard, because without Hans Island their westernmost border is Greenland which is nowhere near the upcoming shipping lanes. Canada on the other hand will probably get a piece of the pie either way.
      • Excellent points. Considering the rate of Artic melting, perhaps Canada should go back and plant a flag with a somewhat taller flagpole?

      • Re:So there really isn't anything new under the su (Score:4, Interesting)

        by k98sven ( 324383 ) on Saturday July 30, 2005 @12:19AM (#13200455) Journal
        +5 insightful?! Misinformed at best.

        For one there is a natural resources issue. There are billions of barrels of oil buried along the north slope of Alaska and Canada not too far from this island.

        Look on a map? Here's one [google.com]. That white spec is Hans Island, in the sound between Greenland and Ellesmere Island. Now zoom out and check the distance to the Canadian-Alaskan border where the oil. It's pretty damn far. (Yes, the distance is distorted in this projection, but it's still about half the width of the USA.)

        The idea here is that this route will pass within the territorial boundary marker of Hans Island. Denmark has far more to lose in this regard, because without Hans Island their westernmost border is Greenland which is nowhere near the upcoming shipping lanes.

        This is complete nonsense. Again, Hans Island is in the sound between Ellesmere island and Greenland. Not Baffin Island. It is not anywhere near the North Western passage. (Heck, the island isn't even in-frame on Wikipedia's map) [wikipedia.org]

        And Denmark hasn't made any claim to the Northwest Passage anyway. The USA has though. (Or rather, the USA does not recognize it as Canadian waters)

  • Let's see what googlefight has to say! (Score:3, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:34PM (#13199250)
    Hans Island belongs to Greenland
            5,200 results
    Hans Island belongs to Canada
            39,500 results

  • Searching for a battleground (Score:3, Funny)

    by WindozeSux ( 857211 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:34PM (#13199251)
    What are they gonna do with Google, search for locations to fight at? :)
  • Because fighting over barren sand isn't interesting enough, now we have folks bickering over a barren rock in the middle of the Arctic Ocean. Yeah- go Western Civilization! w00t!

    • It is not the island (Score:5, Insightful)

      by HermanAB ( 661181 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:43PM (#13199309)
      it is the surrounding waters that are important. If you own a tiny spec of an island, then you can claim 200km or economic sea waters around it. This area may contain oil, manganese nodules, fish, whatever. One example is a tiny little French island in the middle of the Canadian oil fields off the coast of Newfoundland. Canada doesn't want that to happen again. As the sea ice keeps melting, the northern tundra and sea passage becomes more important. Canada has to enforce its authority there.
    • Go humanity! Let's fight and die over how we Crack the shell off a boiled egg! (with a knike, vs. with a spoon!)

      Yes, that's a literature reference
  • A piece of rock barely as big as a football field.

  • A solution... (Score:4, Funny)

    by tktk ( 540564 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:36PM (#13199262)
    they should fight it out over Counterstrike.

    It's 1.3 square km. in the Arctic. The only good use for that spot is another Starbucks.

  • Oh how cute...unarmed Western nations bickering and threatening each other...(pats each on their fluffy heads)
    • Yeah, it's cute. The really odd thing is this is the first time I hear of a government using text ads to further its PR war in an international dispute.

      This could legitimize adwords and similar programs for many governments and advocacy organizations- and spell more profits for Google. Hopefully, this will also raise the level of discourse!
    • Comment removed based on user account deletion
  • I can confirm that the ad does show up. the link goes to here. [www.um.dk]

    What I feel bad about is the fact that these ads were placed by citizens of their respective countries. Now that slashdot will be battering the click-through into oblivion... at $.05 a click...

    might get mighty expensive...
    • Maybe it's the slashdot bias (i bet lot of ppl coming from slashdot are googling it), but the only sponsored ad I see is "WebDesign By Skilled Team
      Very professional and affordable".

      • Yeah... Just did another google and it did not show up for me. hmm. Just curious, but is this the first slashdot story covering a google ad? I wonder if there is a precident for google to immediatly take down the ad if suddenly hundreds of thousands geeks start plowing their way into it. :)

  • I don't get it (Score:4, Insightful)

    by WildBeast ( 189336 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:38PM (#13199276) Journal
    It's an unhabitable island. Can't even get to it during the winter and it's really tiny.
    What do they want from it exactly?
    • Nobody wants anything from it. There's nothing else to fight over, and as Canadians largely don't give a damn about soccer, this is pretty much the only thing that Canucks and Danes can argue about. Well, perhaps it's revenge for sending over a Montreal Mafia stooge to be ambassador to Denmark.

    • Re:I don't get it (Score:5, Insightful)

      by puppetman ( 131489 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:48PM (#13199340) Homepage
      It sets a precedent.

      Canada is arguing with the US about the Northwest Passage. The US claims it's international waters, and Canada claims it's within it's boundries, and thus internal waters.

      Make a slip in international law once, and it may haunt you for all times. The maritime border between the Yukon and Alaska is under dispute, as is Canada's claim to the continental shelf in the Artic. Canada can't concede here, or it may have to concede elsewhere, when it's more important.

      Of course, Canada has no ability to patrol it's northern border. The Canadian Coast Guard is a fine institution stuck with aging ships, few of which have ice-strengthened hulls.

      A good description is here [naval.ca]

      In the spirit of french-fries becoming freedom fries, I ask all fellow Canadians to stop using the word danish for that flakey, overly sweet pastry, and instead use the term freedom-pastry.

      • Re:I don't get it (Score:3, Informative)

        by Durrik ( 80651 )
        Unfortunately, and not to raise a flame war, but the US treats almost all coastal Canadian waters as International waters.

        The small straight between Vancouver Island, and the mainland coast of Canada is under dispute as well. The US likes to use it as a torpedo proving ground. Which of course upsets all the whale watchers. Since the torpedos use sonar, which the enviromentalists claim distracts the whales. Of course the US Navy claims it doesn't, its a royal mess.

        The Northwest Passage is also one of the
    • From what I heard on NPR, the thought was that global warming might make the island more accessible to shipping traffic in the future, at which point there may be natural resources that can be economically extracted from the island and its vicinity.
    • Which might become more important as time goes on with global warming--I don't know how much fishing might go on at that latitude. Nations sometimes go all out for fishing rights. Right now South Korea has troops on the Takeshima (as the Japanese call them) or Dokdo (in Korean) island and it's causing a little bit of tension [washingtonpost.com]. Of course there's also some oil in the region which probably doesn't help matters either.
    • It's an unhabitable island. Can't even get to it during the winter and it's really tiny. What do they want from it exactly?

      Underpants!

    • It's an unhabitable island. Can't even get to it during the winter and it's really tiny.
      What do they want from it exactly?

      Why do all your suburbanite neighbors spend time and money growing masses of grass, which are no good to them, since they never leave their air-conditioned house?

      It's all about penis length.

  • The Future of War (Score:5, Funny)

    by chia_monkey ( 593501 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:41PM (#13199293) Journal
    And all this time when they said "future wars will be fought by computer", I had a totally other idea in mind.
  • Just search google GROUPS:

    http://groups-beta.google.com/groups?q=han's+islan d [google.com]

    Turns up this gem:

    "Return to Han's Island" ETD2

    (bouncing off an original suggested title "Han's Island",
    besides, "Blood and Steel" was taken)

    Bolo [Yang Tze] is alive and now controls the island,
    which is now a training ground. The island is a shadow of
    its former self. Everything has been dismantled by the
    authorities. No radios, electricity, no drugs or servants.
    It's a primitive island. Bolo is much older now and needs
    glasses becaus

  • "Notwithstanding the disputed area, the Canadian foreign affairs ministry is allowing its cafeteria to sell Danish pastries as a goodwill gesture toward the Danish government and people," said ministry spokesman Reynald Doiron.

    It seems that there is hope that this senseless war can be avoided. I don't like the thought of so many brave Canadian and Danish soldiers being tragically lost in the frozen wasteland of the Arctic. And the last thing that ANYONE wants to deal with is the Hansian insurgency.

  • Hey you Danes ... (Score:5, Funny)

    by Kaz Kylheku ( 1484 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:49PM (#13199346) Homepage
    Get your friggin' Hans off our island, okay?

    • Ode to Hans (Score:5, Funny)

      by MightyMartian ( 840721 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:54PM (#13199376) Journal
      'Twas a bitter day, that day they came,
      Canucks and Danes, both ready to say,
      "This isle is ours, so piss off you jerks,
      Or we'll Google and Slashdot the entire works!"

      Well, Canada blustered, and Denmark stomped,
      And some nerdie netizens submitted the lot,
      To Google fine, that online star,
      To win an island that could fit in a jar.

      When it came to blows, aye those blows did ring,
      As North Atlantic seals all gathered to see,
      These crazy goddamn bastards fight for Hans,
      The most ludicrous, uninhabitable chunk of land.

  • Familiar sounding (Score:5, Funny)

    by inkswamp ( 233692 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:53PM (#13199372)
    Isn't this reminiscent of what was said about the British and the Argentinians fighting over the Falkland Islands: It was like watching two bald men fight over a comb?

  • Northwest Passage Skirmish (Score:5, Informative)

    by Doc Ruby ( 173196 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @07:58PM (#13199392) Homepage Journal
    This battle is not merely over tiny little Hans Island. It is part of the positioning of Arctic countries, including Canada and Denmark (via Greenland), for access to the Arctic Sea. The Sea is now clearly destined to remain navigable [bbc.co.uk] for most, if not all, of the year, due to Greenhouse warming that has melted over 40% of the previous Summer ice. At 9% melt per decade, already begun, many ohttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Northwest_passagef [wikipedia.org] us will live to see the European "holy grail" of the Northwest Passage finally gained. The more national territory around the circle, the easier it will be for ships to travel under that nation's "protection". Subject to its rules and taxes, of course.
    • It's not the island by itself that is important to these two nations - the important point is that the island grants the nation maritime territorial rights.
    • Sure, but that'll come at a price. At least the surfing will be great in Vegas!
    • Sure as hell it won't be Denmark that has to deal with tanker spills, pollution turning the ice black and melting it, endangered species, and military protection of the other zillion islands in the Arctic.

      So IMO, Denmark can just F.R.O. They bring nothing to the party, but want to take it all away.
      • We'll all be dealing with their Greenland ice melting. Unlike the floating Arctic ice, which brings subtler (though devastating) problems, Greenland's landborne runoff will probably raise the global seas around 20 feet, on average. Which means 10 feet some places, and 30 feet other places. Or just higher amplitude global tides, or both. Combined with 16 feet from the landborne part of the Western Antarctic Ice Shelf, most humans will be affected. Either directly by Bangladesh-style inundation, or from the f
    • With a name like "Hans" surely it must be Danish, but what happens when the big meltdown puts it below sea level?

  • Google Map (Score:5, Informative)

    by molo ( 94384 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @08:14PM (#13199499) Journal
    In case you are wondering where this is.

    http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=80.827952,-66.64718 6&spn=0.015675,0.101435&hl=en [google.com]

    -molo

  • FIGHT AGAINST THE INVAISON (Score:3, Funny)

    by i_ate_god ( 899684 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @08:21PM (#13199535)
    ANY MOVE THAT INFRINGES UPON CANADIAN SOVERIEGNTY SHOULD BE MET WITH THE GREATEST OF FORCE AGAINST THE DANES.

    THE DANISH GOVERNMENT HAS ATTEMPTED (without success) TO INVADE CANADA A TOTAL OF THREE TIMES IN THE PAST 15 YEARS. It is bad enough that true and proud Canadian culture is being ENCROACHED UPON by less than tasteful americanism, but to be invaded by WARSHIPS is UNACCEPTABLE.

    Here are somethings that we can do to protest the Danish government and it's hostile actions:

    - Rename danishes to Artic Freedom Delights and boycott resturants like Tim Hortons if they do not abide.

    - Burn Hans Christian Anderson books

    - If you haven't already, boycott Metallica, which you should be doing anyways because of their unwaivering support of the RIAA.

    - Fight against danish lies. It was an ITALIAN who discovered electromagnetism. But Danish propaganda fooled most of the world.

    - Declare PHP a Canadian invention. The Danish Government doesn't want you to know this, but Mr. Lerdorf WAS A CANADIAN CITIZEN.

    These are all peaceful political protests, but we Canadians should be ready to face the reality of the situation. After all, the danes did try to invade Canada at least three times. We still have to explore all diplomatic possibilities, but if you are a proud Canadian, when the time comes, you will take up arms to defend the Great North from the invaders. This is the Cold War of the 21st Century. CANADIAN INTERESTS AND SOVEREIGNTY MUST BE PROTECTED AT ALL COSTS.

    OH CANADA, I STAND ON GAURD FOR THEE

  • Where else would it be? (Score:5, Funny)

    by dlleigh ( 313922 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @08:36PM (#13199611)
    I loved this line:

    The Danes say the countries' history of friendly relations should not be subjected to periodic squabbles over a frigid rock barely larger than a football field just south of the North Pole.

    At least it's accurate; they could have said something really stupid like "just west of the North Pole".

  • This is like two bald men fighting over a comb
  • They used it for centuries and I'm sure people in northern Canada have too since they are probably the same people.

      How about letting the Inuit (not sure if they are the same in Greenland) have the island as an autonomous region? In a way it would be shared by Canada, Greenland and the indeginous people of the area.

  • The US may actually have to intervene...no kidding (Score:4, Interesting)

    by voss ( 52565 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @09:55PM (#13199934)
    The territory was unclaimed prior to 1985,
    Allowing a European nation (denmark) to effectively claim new territory in waters of North America violates the Monroe Doctrine. While Canada is not a very good claimant its the only claimant that is compatible with US interests. If Greenland were independent it wouldnt be an issue, but I dont like the idea of Canada being forced to cede territory in North America to the EU(denmark).

  • Patrick Zevo, "Toys" (1992): I can't even eat. The food keeps touching. I like military plates, I'm a military man, I want a military meal. I want my string beans to be quarantined! I like a little fortress around my mashed potatoes so the meatloaf doesn't invade my mashed potatoes and cause mixing in my plate! I HATE IT when food touches! I'm a military man, you understand that? And don't let your food touch either, please?
  • Ice hockey sticks vs. cans of Tuborg
  • The Danes can have Hans Island if they give us Greenland. It'll help satisfy our expansionistic tendancies and we'll make the Russians uneasy. Look out Alaska!

    Little known fact, the Alaskan panhandle is American simply because the Brits felt giving it to the U.S. would help encourage them to join a war against the Kaiser. Course they balked on the deal and didn't show up until 3 years into it. America should give it back.
  • A little postage-stamp size rock that's ice-bound 364 days of the year with a population of exactly zero (0) -- who gives a shit? These governments need to get out more: go to the pub, lift a drink or two, get a date, get a life!

    (At least we geeks only argue about important things like the superiority of emacs over vi.)

  • Possession is 9/10 of the law! (Score:3, Interesting)

    by sssmashy ( 612587 ) on Friday July 29, 2005 @11:57PM (#13200385)

    The solution to this territorial dispute is really quite simple.

    Canada should build a permanent settlement on the island - a humble cabin equipped with a satellite dish, diesel fuel tanks, a generator, and a large store of rations.

    Some lucky private from the Canadian armed forces would be dispatched to guard the island in 3-month shifts, equipped with lots of pornography and a 50 calibre machine gun to scare off any encroaching Danish helicopters.

  • Bleargh! (Score:3, Funny)

    by Biomechanical ( 829805 ) on Saturday July 30, 2005 @01:05AM (#13200602) Homepage

    This whole thing reminds me of the Terry Pratchett novel Jingo.

    Overnight, an island basically pops up out of the sea, right smack-bang equidistant between Klatch and the city-state of Ankh-Morpork, and suddenly everyone's arguing about going to war to "knock johnny foreigner" off of their bit of land.

    Damn shame there's no roundworld equivalent of Sir Samuel Vimes who's going to go and arrest everyone forcing the argument over this for "disturbing the peace", "loitering with intent to cause an affray" (occupying the island with troops), and basically throw the dickheads claiming it as their own into prison for 30 days.

    It would be nice if Hans Island just sunk into the ocean and disappeared. Wouldn't the people claiming the place as their own have egg on their faces then?

    `Haha, you silly bastards lost an island!'

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